Laundry can be an issue at our house. Or, rather, laundry processes can be an issue. There are eight of us in this house. Six of us do our own laundry. There is one washer and one dryer. The mathematics of this scenario are not really insurmountable. Not really complicated, even. Except. Except that the reality is that, instead of everyone getting that laundry accomplished in an orderly manner, it typically goes something like this:
Party A surveys his epic pile of laundry and discovers he has literally nary a stitch with which to cloth his body tomorrow. It is well into the evening hours at this point. He attempts to begin the laundry process only to find the washer occupied with Party B’s wet clothes that have lain there languishing for three days. He goes to track down Party B (with less than dulcet tones), which alerts Party C to the memory that she left her clothes in the dryer on some undisclosed date earlier. She goes to retrieve them only to find that Party D has removed them from the dryer in order to utilize said machine. Instead of a dry pile of wrinkled artifacts, Party C finds a disheveled pile of damp clothes. Apparently, Party D intervened somewhere shy of the end of their cycle. In the ensuing scuffle, Party D explains the imperative nature of his laundering needs at the moment of his removing slightly damp items belonging to Party C and depositing them unceremoniously into said laundry basket. . .
It was into such a scenario that I stumbled on Saturday, and not for the first time. But, I vowed that it would be the last. I walked through the house, measuring wrists, and retreated to my scrap basket. I returned half an hour later, victorious proof in hand. I explained that anyone wishing to utilize the laundry equipment in our household would henceforth be required to wear one of these bracelets at all times while their items were in the machines. Blue for the washer, Red for the dryer.
There was no small amount of eye rolling at this announcement and the attractive fashion accessories I was wielding. But, this is not the first time their mother has sewn her way to peace and tranquility in this home. Peacekeeping bracelets for the win.